So I'm a 27 year old girl living in Melbourne, Australia and have been single since late December 09. I was in a relationship for about 8 months and it was the first serious relationship I'd been in for over 4 years... I really like it and when I broke up with my ex wanted to get straight back into a relationship. So.... I joined RSVP (an online dating site) in mid February this year.
On RSVP you need to pay to make contact with the other members so I bought what they call 'stamps' so I was able to email potential mates. The first weekend I was on there I sent out 'kisses' (kisses are free ways to make contact to see if the other user is interested before spending money to email) to a lot of guys and got a few 'I'm interested' 'kisses' back. So I send out emails to those that said they were interested and ended up meeting up the following weekend with one guy.
This guy Jack and I went on a number of dates all over the the city and suburbs of where we both lived close by. It was a lot of fun. We both at the time were living with our parents (Jack with his mum and me with both of mine) so it was hard for us to spend 'quality' time together but as his mum had a boyfriend we managed to spend afternoons at his place while she was out with her partner.
Jack and my dating lasted three weeks until we were lying in his bed after spending some 'quality' time together and were talking about why I didn't get my monthly. I explained to him that it was because I was on medication. He of course asked for some more information about the medication and I just said I had Bi-polar as it was easier then explaining the truth (I may get into that story another time). To this Jack did not react well and started getting dressed. I did the same and he then told me her could not handel it as he had a alcoholic abusive ex-wife (all news to me) and didn't want to deal with anything like that again. So that was the end of Jack and I.
Then there were more 'kisses' and more emails and dates none of which went anywhere but it was all fun meeting new people and going out to different places. All the while I was still in contact with my ex secretly hoping he would get back with me. I think met about 10 different guys and some I saw for a few weeks but at the time I was a smoker so most of them were turned off by this. Some even saying that they couldn't date me because of this (not something new as my ex made me stop too and I only started again when we broke up).
In the end I gave up smoking. Not just in the hope of meeting some one but also because I just didn't want to be a smoker anymore, so I got hypnotised and it worked (well I sometime have a herbal smoke when I'm out with my girlfriends but that's about it and it's been 7 weeks now). As soon as I changes my details on RSVP to say 'don't smoke' I got so many more responses and instently felt more attractive to the oposite sex.
I'd been looking at the events page on the RSVP website and saw that there was a company that ran speed-dating. I told a girlfriend and she was keen to go along with me as she was also single but not wanting to go on a dating site. So I booked however my friend never got around to booking and I ended up going on my own. This was ok as, as soon as I got there another two girl saw me at the bar and asked me to hang out with them before the event.
We were lead up stairs, were we had an ice-breaker game before the speed-dating began. There was about 60 people there, half of each sex and we made up 3 groups. This meant that there were 10 guys and 10 girls in each group and you have a 4 minute date with each person in your group. After each date you ticked yes or no next to the persons name on a card. At the end of the night everyone handed in there card and would receive an email the next day with our matches. I had ticket yes for 5 of the guys I met and the next day got 3 matches (not bad odds). In email with matches I got the email address of the guys. One of the guys Sebastian emailed me that day and we emailed back and forth before exchanging numbers. The other two I emailed but never heard back from. Sebastian was keen to meet up and asked me out a few times but it was never a good time for me or I hadn't been left with the best impression of him from out meeting. I guess looking back you can't tell much from 4 minutes but none the less I never met up with him.
After being on RSVP for 4 months and without meeting The one I decided to deactivate my profile. The real reason for doing this was that I was hoping to get back with my ex. I thought that because I was no longer smoking and had gotten back into my fitness (something else he didn't like about me) that he would want to take me back. So the next few weeks I spent trying to show him that I was the 'right one' for him. We would catch up and call each other and he would say at the end of each meeting that we should do it again. So silly me saw this as him wanting to get back with me. Then one Sunday I was having brunch with my girlfriend and I told her how I felt about my ex and what I was trying to do. She said I needed to tell him and see what he wanted. I knew she was right but I also knew that if we had this conversation that I would have to stop talking to him as it couldn't keep going the way it was. When I got home that afternoon I called my ex and he said what I had thought he would. He didn't feel the same way... We both decided that it was better not to have contact for a while and I haven't heard from him since and that was 3 weeks ago.
So as soon I had that conversation with my ex I thought the best way to get over him was to do what I did when we first broke up and that was to get back onto RSVP and dating again.
Well that is what I did....
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